How could you know!

Time for our annual ground rules. Before we go there 6 just has to make a statement about how many rules and regulation we have to deal with every day. Let us start at the top, 10 commandments, turns into 7 articles of the US constitution, which turns into (10) amendments the bill of rights, then to 17 other amendments. From there we need to complicate it even further resulting in countless number of federal, state, and local laws. What this means is something very simple has become so complex that no one other than the 6 could keep them all straight! Every single day our tax dollars are being spent by individuals who are doing nothing but making rules laws or whatever you want to call them to meet the constantly changing demands of their people. 50% of them make no sense at all and never take root, 49% of them grow like weeds but after 10 to 20 years just fade away and are never seen again, relinquished to the dark dusty law books. That leaves the 1% that actually takes root and makes a change for our lives. This one percent is the 17 amendments that we have put on the books in the past 200 plus years. So let’s just simplify our constitution from last year.

Kiawah Constitution: Pre-amble, We the people of the Kiawah Vacation alliance, in Order to form a more perfect Vacation, establish relaxation, insure family tranquility, provide for Rex, promote general debauchery, and savor  the Blessings we all have.

 1) everyday take a  10 minutes  and think about why we insist on taking something so simple and turn it into something that changes it shape more often than the breaking of the waves on Kiawah. 2) The GPB is full of          Wisdom, intelligence, and maturity (not age), so never question his judgment. 3) Follow the docket the GPB mandates.   See a simple set of rules this year!

Couple more things: Cousins night out is out! Girl’s night is in! No bare feet or flip flops in the condo, socks at all times. No profanity except during Hota and Kathy lee. No internet or phones unless pre-approved by GPB. Rex Everyday on the beach at 5:00, Gentleman Jack Sunday at 8:15 PM. Dinner at 7:00. Bring your 2014 Kiawah shirts (formal and wife beater). Lights out at 10:00 except for 61,62 and 71, their job is to keep 8 up all night long. Avoid pond 302 the gators are nesting. Water temp is 82 and rising, needs to be 84 for the jellies to come in. Sharks are attracted to shiny objects and bright colors, so ware your jewelry and pink cozy (7 shave your head before you come they love blood). Must all attend the new Family Vacation (July 29^th).

Words of Wisdom: keep you life simple; let your roots grow deep, so you don’t let the winds of change lead you off of the path.

Time for the dinner schedule

The travel plan is somewhat different this year. This year 6  will not be packing the truckster to the gills with beach paraphernalia, we are going to join the rest of the rich family members over there on Melody lane, and fly the friendly skies! No 6 did not win the “pig –in the- poke” and yes my bonus this year was the one year subscription to the jelly of the month club, so 6 doesn’t want to hear it!  I can’t wait for the stewardess to ask me what I want to drink, and 6 will just sit back and say give me a coke, and since airline travel is so luxurious now, she will ask if 6 would like it in the can, and with a surprised look 6 will respond I’ll have it right here! Well now that 6 thinks about it he will probably turn it down, since they charge you a buck for the darn thing! Now what 6 did not realize was how much the rich members of our group (32 aren’t you glad 6 changed his term this year) have to spend to get to paradise! Don’t you –all worry, just because you all have moved up to the east side, 6 still is in the north side, so any hep to defray the cost would be much appreciated. 6 is going to borrow a empty coke can from the other condo, place it on the kitchen table, and will be proud to accept any donation you would like to give to defray the cost! Believe it or not the generosity has already started, for example: it costs $25 bucks to check a bag, and 6A wants to check her bag,  so in great form 7 said he would rent a u-haul and drive her luggage down to Kiawah, that alone will save 6 $50 bucks! Now if  0, 4, 8, and 71 can each  pack a chair or two that takes care of the chairs! Now the other big expense is the car, but as you might guess 6 has that figures out as well! Here is the plan for the car, 6 doesn’t need one! 8 has to go to the airport and pick up 0 and 7 late at night, so all 8 has to do is go to the airport that afternoon pick us up, drop us off at the hotel, spend a little time site seeing in the city. 6 will offer to buy him a couple drinks at the managers reception at the hotel, then he can take us out to dinner. After dinner and drinks he will just have enough time to go back to the airport and pick them up. The next day around lunch time, 8 can come back and pick us up take us to the Rex store, and just be in time to go back to the airport to pick up 61. 8: 6 knows that you will not mind after all you are going down a couple days early this year, so in reality you will have the same amount of beach time as the rest of us! Ok that takes care of the chairs, the luggage, and the car, the only thing left is the food. As one might expect 6 has an answer to that hurdle as well! Here is the deal, when 4, 8 and 71 go food shopping the first day, please stop at wall-mart and pick me out a couple things… 5 cans of spaghetti sauce, 4 pounds of noodles, two large bags of meat balls, a bag of salad, a bottle of salad dressing (of your choice) 200 yards of rope, two pulleys, and a couple of nails, 6 thinks that will do it . Oh no 6 forgot, pick up a couple bottles of extra sun screen, and don’t forget 6’s family prefers the spray on kind 50 spf or above and some good stuff for 6A, 61 and 62 to put on their faces. Now that I am thinking about it… 7 .. did you make it to the Harley dealer to get us some new dew rags? 6 can’t forget his sensitive bald head! 6 thinks he is all done now, that is the: car, chairs, food, Rex, and the sun screen… has 6 forgot anything?  6 would like to thank all of my rich siblings in advance for their support, for without you all pitching in, 6 would not have a wonderful family vacation. Sure it might put you out a little bit, but just think for the happiness you will bestow on your favorite brother/uncle/son and his family! 

Things the 6 needs to do prior to vacation: Update the ground rules we have  several new ones.. Gentleman Jack on the beach, passing breakfast and lunch to the 6 family condo (that is what the rope is for), who is going to drive me to the store each day, who is going to drive me to turtle to pick up my picture with Johnny Rodgers (6 would think that its doe by now).. Expect and update list of ground rules next week!

Words of Wisdom:  Everything fades and returns to the earth, family lives on forever as long as we don’t let go.

Life goes marching on!

As each day passes we (should) gain wisdom. Wisdom is not maturity, wisdom is not knowledge so what is it?  It is the quality or state of being wise; knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action; sagacity, discernment, or insight. For example, is it wise for a man to be in a Speedo on the beach at Kiawah?  Let take a deeper look at Speedo man.  Maturity, he has to be at least in his 40’s for it has been 20 years since a Speedo was in style. 6 knows that age doesn’t necessarily translate in to maturity, but let’s face it, he had to have some level of maturity because he had a wife and children and was at Kiawah. Knowledge, this is not France it is a family beach!  His actions were a sure sign of a lack of wisdom, for he was only thinking of himself, and demonstrating no long term insight. How about the girl who went into the donut shop and licked the donuts and said she hated America!   That was not very wise. You don’t have to be smart to have wisdom, you don’t have to be old to have wisdom, it is simply a gift. Always strive for the truth, and exercise actions based on those truths.

You might be wondering why I stared this blog with a lecture; well it is for the young ones among us who feel like they are getting old. You know who you are… major milestone birthday etc… We all think that maturity comes with age, we all think that knowledge comes from books, in most cases that is correct. So therefore it stands to reason that the older you are the smarter and more mature you are, in most cases that is correct. Along the way never let the dreams of youth disappear, always strive for the truth, keep your eyes wide open observe all act on truth not emotion, and you will gain the best gift of all Wisdom. Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-lagunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice. In other words wisdom!  Have fun, enjoy life, and work hard, for it is not easy. You will have your ups and downs Dude  and Dudesess, but if you keep your eyes wide open and keep the truth, you will get through,  you will gain wisdom. Don’t forget stupid is as stupid does. Keep your dreams strive for the dreams you had at 17,  for it will keep you wise.

Words of wisdom: New tradition… Sunday night: bottle of Gentleman Jack, on the beach